I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize