Having a random hookup so left but love u
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
His nipple licking is glorious
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