I feel great
I just peed on a car
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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