After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Randomize
