okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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