I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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