she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just want nice things and good sex
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
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