Well apparently he's into motor boating.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
