she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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