He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
We are two peas in an std pod
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
