Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize