I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
