Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I think my moral compass just broke
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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