it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
and i looked up. we had an audience...
birth control should be required to get into college
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
