Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize