You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
