I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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