so explain again why im purple
no
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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