She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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