...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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