once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
