I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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