Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
you made out with another girl for some wings
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