Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize
