I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
