So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
