I look better un-naked...
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
