So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
We're too hungover to prance.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
