so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
