Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
