3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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