Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
