Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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