Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
