Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
She told me I should be a condom model.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
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