so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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