White coat. Heels.
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize