she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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