I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
