So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
