i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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