Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
