You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
