if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
