it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
