I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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