You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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