Will you blow on my dice?
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize