why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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