On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
